eD! and Jeff are back after a long period of technical nonsense that caused all sorts of issues with their recap of the Apple event, some basic human maintenance that eD!’s been engaging in that has made him feel less like a gnarled old man, details on where they’ve been all this time, and their newfound quest for whimsy!

Also, as a side note, eD! owes dbrand an apology — he thinks that his AirPods Pro case might have been to blame for his wireless charging issues, not their case for his AirPods Pro, so he’s a real piece of shit for saying otherwise. Oh, and you can get the Ghost case that eD! and Jeff bought here — that’s not an affiliate link or something, dbrand just makes nice stuff and deserves your money to be honest!

Transcript (As Determined By Robots)

eD! Thomas: [00:00:00] And so anyway, I picked the phone off the ground, and I looked at it, and the lockscreen was Queen Elizabeth’s titties. And it was really weird. 

Jeff Ritter: I don’t know how I’d feel about that.

eD! Thomas: Yeah, it was, it was uncomfortable, it was uncomfortable. They weren’t very regal, is, uh, the problem to me 

Jeff Ritter: I don’t want unsolicited Queen Elizabeth titty pics.

eD! Thomas: No, it’s the least ideal thing that could have possibly happened. 

Welcome to the Nearly Coherent podcast, I’m eD, and joining me as always, a man who just makes, makes everyday beautiful and makes my nipples harder than titanium. It’s my buddy Jeff. Jeff, how are you, you handsome son of a bitch?

Jeff Ritter: I’m doing well. I’m doing very well. And I must say, the color pop that you’ve got going on in your shirt brightens up my life even more than you normally do. It looks, it looks good on you. It looks good on 

eD! Thomas: you.

very [00:01:00] much. It’s very citrus themed. There’s lemons and oranges on this one. I also have another one that’s a black shirt with a whole bunch of flamingos on it.

Jeff Ritter: Awesome.

eD! Thomas: And I’ve also gotten myself a couple of like, blue geometric pattern ones. So yeah, I’m gonna, I’m now adding color to my life.

Jeff Ritter: It’s very nice. You look very handsome. I approve. I approve.

eD! Thomas: This is everything I wanted to hear. We can end this episode right now, for all I care.

Jeff Ritter: All right. So normally, uh, I would be for that as my will to live has dwindled to next to nothing. But this is, this is a banner week. Uh, this is the big one. This is 

eD! Thomas: This is literally the only episode we really give a shit about.

Jeff Ritter: It’s, 

eD! Thomas: As you can tell by the fact that this is the only one that’s gonna come out on schedule. It’s gonna be intense.

Jeff Ritter: It’s the only one that I’m confident is even going to come [00:02:00] out . So, you know, but the, the truth is for anybody that does listen to us, we are, uh, grateful for you, glad that you listen to us. But, but make no mistake about it, we do plenty of these where we just fucking talk to each other and wouldn’t even release them.

Uh, this definitely is for us. You are more than welcome to come along for the journey. But we’re here for us, and we are here for a reason today. Although, you know what, maybe I should take that back, because I feel like this episode, of all episodes, is the one that provides the most service to our listeners.

eD! Thomas: true. This is really a public service that we provide.

Jeff Ritter: Yeah, I think so. I mean, this is the one that the Maltese fucking eat up. So, without further ado, my friend, it’s time. 

eD! Thomas: [00:03:00] Let me start you off by saying, Happy iPhone Announcement Day.

Jeff Ritter: happy iPhone announcement, I tried to pull back, I didn’t want to tell everybody what it was, I wanted you to say it, 

I know they

eD! Thomas: know. They know it’s September. We’re here. Uh, we’re talking. I’m saying things that make no sense. “My nipples are hard as titanium.” That’s a random metal to bring out. Unless you know things.

Jeff Ritter: oh,

eD! Thomas: can’t see my head, Bob, but you can.

Jeff Ritter: he’s uh, it’s a, it’s a very like, sly, subjective, A seductive [00:04:00] rather, back and forth motion, like a, a real come hither type of, uh, head. It’s not even a head bob, really. I guess it 

eD! Thomas: it’s like a slide. It’s a head slide.

Jeff Ritter: he’s kind of going back and, you know, side to side. 

eD! Thomas: I’ve been, I’m gonna, before we get to the Apple things, I’ve been doing like, you know, those assisted stretches places?

Jeff Ritter: Yes.

eD! Thomas: I started going to one. Uh, let me tell you, like, first of all, I do not have hamstrings. I have ham rods. As flexible as I am in my ability to think and pick up on new subjects and all that, I am inflexible physically.

I am a rock. I make 90 year old geriatric, gnarled old men look spry. I

Jeff Ritter: you are a, you are the Tin Man before oil for

eD! Thomas: Yeah, 100%. And then they were like, “Hey, come in for 30 minutes for free.” And I did. And let me tell you, I’ve never felt better. And now I’m starting to wonder if maybe, like, doing basic upkeep on this meat [00:05:00]vehicle that carries my brain around might have been a good idea the whole time.

Jeff Ritter: Uh, damn, I’m so glad that you didn’t say something I needed to react to because I went right into fucking outer space with “Meat Vehicle”.

you yeah, yeah, that one, that crept up on me, but well done. Um,

eD! Thomas: That’s the sort of joke you can come up with. When you can actually bend over, uh, and touch your toes a little bit. Like not,

not, not 

not from, uh, Close. I’m getting closer. Yeah, 

Jeff Ritter: Can you get more than halfway down your shin? 

eD! Thomas: can.

Jeff Ritter: Jesus, that’s

eD! Thomas: And I’ve only done two.

Jeff Ritter: What a low bar on physical fitness we set on the Nearly Coherent podcast. Did you hear me just say past mid shin? You said yes. And I very like. Almost unbelievable, like, with an unbelieving, uh, uh, uh, theory on this, my voice said, Jesus, that’s impressive.

What? You know? That is a low fucking bar. And, and [00:06:00] you’re the one in probably better physical shape of the two of us, you know? Like, definitely, 

eD! Thomas: is grim with a capital G.

Jeff Ritter: Yeah, it might be. So we, um,

eD! Thomas: As everyone knows, this podcast is all about hashtag health and fitness. So, you know, they know what we’re about.

Jeff Ritter: Of course we’re, I’m telling you it’s a little something for everybody. I mean, uh, so I gotta get back to the stretching real quick. Cause I, I have to know about, I, I, as everybody knows, I don’t listen to the, Apple event because I really like my I like being walked through this with my childlike wonderment but I’m gonna touch on this stretching real quick because I have wanted to try this for so long and the crippling fear of them stretching me into a position where I like produce some sort of like [00:07:00] room clearing fart is what keeps me from doing it. You know cuz I walk in I walk in and they see me and they’re like “Who’s stretching the boulder over here?

Like I’m not fucking doing this. This guy’s gonna fart all over the place!” I’m sure that they’re thinking that I’m thinking that it’s just weird. So I haven’t gone yet So now that you’ve gone is is that a possibility?

eD! Thomas: I mean, is it a possibility? Yeah, but the people that I’ve met are super cool about, like, like, I’ve made several, like, they spend a lot of time doing a lot of lower back stuff, because again, hamrods, um, they’re doing a lot of lower, lower back stuff, so there’s a lot of feet in their face, and I keep on making the, “uh, hey, how’s this job working out for your foot fetish” joke, and they have all loved it.

They are, they’re not, The place I go to, at least, um, it’s called Stretch Zone, uh, they’re all, like, actually trained [00:08:00] people 

Jeff Ritter: How many jokes I 

eD! Thomas: in this, oh, I know, I know, so many, what a name, mwah, chef’s kiss, uh, compliments, compliments to the marketing team, y’all did it! They’re all, like, actually, like, trained in medical crap, like, with this, so it’s a little bit more clinical.

But that also makes them, cause like every doctor and nurse I know loves fart jokes. And I think these people would too. I think that they’d love it. I think that, I think they’d appreciate it, and appreciate you for doing it.

Jeff Ritter: Okay. Yeah. Cause I’m the type of, I, for those that don’t know what I look like, I’m the type of body that like, when I walk into a place like this, I apologize to the people, you know?

Real quick, real quick story. When my son was born, we were in the, we went to the hospital and my wife was in labor for a long time. And before, when she wasn’t even like, [00:09:00] yeah, pretty much, you know, it’s been 14, you know, 14 years waiting for him to grow. No, I’m just kidding. Uh, so we’re in the hospital and she was in like a, a triage room, not in like a delivery room because they needed delivery rooms for people that were much closer to delivering.

Right. And so it’s, you know, it’s night. They, she had whatever, she fell asleep cause she, I guess she wasn’t like contracting very often anyway. So she falls asleep. I fall asleep in that like weird hospital recliner chair. And during the course of the night, I like rolled over where my, my stomach, my like face was into the chair.

My stomach was like down in the valley there. Uh, and I will tell you, I did not expect to be staying at the hospital for that long. I, I didn’t think that we’d be, you know, in and out in like 20 minutes. I’m like, this isn’t fucking Sport Clips, but I, uh, I didn’t think I would be there like overnight like this.

So I was [00:10:00] wearing like a, I fell asleep wearing a sweatshirt and jeans on this vinyl chair. And I’m a sweaty, disgusting mess. I wake up, my chin is hooked over the top of the chair. I can’t move. And I couldn’t like, I was so sore from being bent backwards that I ended up just… Turning my head to the side to unhook it from the top of the chair and sliding down the chair just onto the fucking floor.

Like this is the middle of the night. Get up. My shirt is over my head. I am sweating like gross. Pull my shirt back down because I’m going to go get a drink. There’s two nurses in there working on my wife. I looked at them and again, I was like, I’m so sorry that you just had to see that. And they’re both laughing.

And the one nurse goes, “It’s okay. We’ve seen worse.” The other nurse, the funniest woman alive, chimes in and goes, “Not much worse, but worse.” And I’m like, damn, I’m like, you two are labor and delivery nurses. Like [00:11:00] you have seen some like miracles, fine, but some disgusting shit

eD! Thomas: Yeah,

Jeff Ritter: You know? So that’s happened, that’s happened to me, and again maybe that’s what started the pattern of apologizing to medical and you know peripheral medical specialists and whatnot, where I’m just like, hey, listen, I’m sorry for what you’re about to deal with here.

So: iPhone day.

eD! Thomas: It’s iPhone day. You wanna do this in ascending order of sexiness?

Jeff Ritter: Dealer’s choice Take me up that mountain. Mm 

eD! Thomas: Alright. Now I’m going to start with a little, a little observation, if you will. And you will, because I’m not going to let you skip this part, deal with it. In the middle of this thing, they did a little sketch, uh, with Octavia Spencer, who totally won me over for the whole sketch. I mean, like she could do no wrong as far as I’m concerned, but where she was being Mother Earth, and they were explaining like all of their [00:12:00] environmental updates.

Jeff Ritter: Hmm

eD! Thomas: That took a lot of time. So that should give you a little glimpse into how action- packed these updates for some of these products are that they were like, yeah, no, we’ve got like 10 minutes to fill with us awkwardly flailing. That’s fine. Yeah. Great.

So yeah, uh, I say that not about the iPhone. I say that about where we’re starting today, which is the Apple Watch.

Jeff Ritter: Okay. So,

eD! Thomas: This is a downer because the Apple Watch is often your favorite. You love your Apple Watch.

Jeff Ritter: And this is new Watch year for me, but I will tell you, I am only getting the new Watch, cause this has been my favorite one. I really enjoy the one I have. Uh, I’m only getting a new Watch if there’s a [00:13:00] new Ultra coming. Otherwise I’m sticking with this one. So Apple Watch hit me.

eD! Thomas: Let’s start, let’s start with, uh, the Series Nine last year was the Series Eight, uh, the Series Nine. I’m going to, I’m going to highlight the differences for you right now. One, it’s called the Series Nine.

Jeff Ritter: Okay.

eD! Thomas: Start starting off on a good note. Um, the biggest feature, uh, change here, there’s two things. First of all, you have the S9 system on a processor chip, which unlike the S. 8, 7, and 6 aren’t apparently not all the same chips, like is those those three generations exact same chip. This one, it has a second generation Ultra Wideband chip. So finding like your iPhone and stuff?

Jeff Ritter: Yep. That’s what I was going to ask. 

eD! Thomas: Okay. that’s cool. [00:14:00] It has 64 gigs of storage now instead of 32.

Jeff Ritter: Don’t think I come fucking

eD! Thomas: Nobody does, literally nobody does, unless if you are downloading the entire Library of Congress of Music onto your watch for some reason, I don’t think you’re hitting it. Uh, and, you know what, I will give it, the one other thing is, it has a screen that gets up to two thousand nits of brightness, as opposed to the Series 8’s one thousand nits of brightness. So it’s a, it’s a bit brighter. It’s actually the same, same brightness as the Apple Watch Ultra that I have. And it’s nice. It’s a, it’s a nice bright screen. It’s great.

Jeff Ritter: Excellent.

eD! Thomas: That’s the majority of the major features. There’s one other thing though. You ever, you ever go about with your hand, I don’t know, like doing something.

[00:15:00] And you get a phone call and you don’t want to stop doing what you’re doing with your hand, but you got to answer that phone call. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, in case if nobody’s picking up on it, I’m insinuating cranking it, uh, you know, getting real down and dirty with yourself, but you’re getting a phone call from maybe like your grandma and you’re like, “Oh no, I got to answer my grandma while I’m still spanking it!”

Well, now you can double tap your fingers and it’ll pick up that call. So you don’t have to take your hand off your hog to go and answer the phone.

Jeff Ritter: A lot. That’s a lot. Hold on a second. Yeah. That’s a lot to process. Number one. Um, there’s no chance I’d answer a call from my grandma’s cause they’re both dead and I don’t have that long of a distance plan on my cell phone carrier. Uh, so I, I, yeah, I don’t, hopefully you can turn that off because I don’t want to accidentally answer a call by doing that.

eD! Thomas: That’s my [00:16:00] concern. There’s a lot like they were showing people turning off their alarms doing that. I would absolutely turn off an essential alarm that way in the middle of the night. It would, I would never, I will never wake up for a flight on time again.

Um, I’m, I’m actually concerned about this feature,

Jeff Ritter: Yeah. Why’d you miss the plane? And I just go, and, and for anybody that can’t see, I did the little, the thumb to index finger tapping gesture that apparently you can answer and calls and stop 

eD! Thomas: Whatever the main action in the app that you’re doing is, is what that will

Jeff Ritter: That’s, that’s pretty cool. I’m wondering what the main, you know, uh, I’d like to see that. That sounds cool.

eD! Thomas: You know what? It does it sound cool to me. Yes. Do I think it’s going to be like the Dynamic Island where it’s like, “Oh, that’s cool for like five minutes. But then nobody does anything with it for a year.” You’re just like,

Jeff Ritter: Yeah. The Dynamic island, the Dynamic Island is [00:17:00] fucking annoying.

eD! Thomas: well, hold that thought.

Jeff Ritter: Okay. Fair enough. 


eD! Thomas: So that’s, that’s the difference between the Apple Watch Series 9 and the Apple Watch Series 8. That was it.

Jeff Ritter: Can I ask you a question? 

eD! Thomas: You can. 

Jeff Ritter: Uh, I, so I have, uh, my Apple Watch has the cell phone plan and I find that it does not work very well on its own cell phone plan. Uh, is that just me or is that just a inherent flaw or am I missing something?

eD! Thomas: Um, that could just be an issue with the actual watch itself. I haven’t had that problem in a very long time. I have not had that problem with, like, the Ultra.

Jeff Ritter: Ah, maybe it’s just this one. 

eD! Thomas: of the Ultra! We’ve got an Ultra 2.

Jeff Ritter: Oh, yes! New Watch coming to town!

eD! Thomas: Yep,

Jeff Ritter: Unless they, did they fuck this one up? Like, did they make it worse? [00:18:00] Okay. I, I even take if they made it the same.

eD! Thomas: And they did!

The difference is that 64 gigs of storage. Uh, it’s got a brighter screen, it’s 3000 nits as compared to 2000 nits, so that’s… Nice, not that I’ve ever had any complaints about the brightness of the screen. Uh, and it’s got the S9 chip, so it can also do doop doop.

Other than that, it’s the same frickin Watch. 

Jeff Ritter: Okay. 

eD! Thomas: But it’s also the same frickin price, so who cares?

Jeff Ritter: Yeah, I’m gonna, I would, I will tell you this, lots of people buy the old, like 15 comes out, so they buy the 14 or the, the Nine comes out. So they buy the, I’m not that guy. I, if I’m, I’m just buying.

eD! Thomas: Not even an option. The Ultra is just like the iPhone Pros, one year and done.

Jeff Ritter: Oh yeah, they’re just gone. Okay, well that’s good. Made my mind up for me. Thank you for doing my thinking for me, Apple.

eD! Thomas: I helped.

Jeff Ritter: Always.

eD! Thomas: Thank you. [00:19:00] Thank you. I appreciate it. Uh, there’s also, uh, the Apple Watch SE. Nothing’s changed there at all. You’re good.

Jeff Ritter: Okay. My daughter got the Apple Watch SE.

eD! Thomas: Nice. Nice. Your daughter likes Snoopy? Does she like Snoopy?

Jeff Ritter: No, not, not that she

eD! Thomas: alright, she’s gonna hate WatchOS 10! Because there’s a Snoopy face, and the Snoopy face is actually dope as hell.

Jeff Ritter: She’d probably like that. She’d like that. We have the Snoopy Christmas decorations and stuff, but my son is the bigger Charlie Brown fan , or Peanuts

eD! Thomas: That’s cool. That’s cool. That’s cool. That’s cool.

Jeff Ritter: Um, So Snoopy watch face in 10. That’s cool. Am I getting out of order? Are we saving software?

eD! Thomas: Uh, software, there wasn’t really any software announcements because all the software stuff is announced in WWDC. And then we didn’t release an episode because the audio recording got screwed up. So maybe I should just run through it real quick. WatchOS 10, which comes out on Monday, the 18th.[00:20:00] Basically the biggest change is that now the side button will bring up the Control Center and scrolling down brings up a whole bunch of widgets.

It’s actually kind of nice. I like it. It makes, it makes photo faces like work better. Cause you don’t have to have complications to see everything.

Jeff Ritter: Yeah. Okay.

eD! Thomas: Uh, that’s pretty dope. I like it. That’s, uh, that’s, that’s all I remember of WatchOS 10.

Jeff Ritter: That’s it. That’s good. That’s 

eD! Thomas: Uh, I’ve only been using the beta for like a week, cause you can’t downgrade the Watch once you do it, but it’s coming out on Monday, so it’s like, eh, eh, eh.

Jeff Ritter: A couple of days. Who’s it gonna hurt?

eD! Thomas: Not me. And that’s the important part. Oh, there’s, there’s the new watch faces, there’s the Snoopy watch face, and some other bullshit that nobody cares about, cause it looks like crap. But the Snoopy one is dope. Snoopy’s animated, so like… If it’s raining, he’ll show up with an umbrella. And, like, if it’s hot, he shows up with an ice cream.

It’s, it’s cool. It’s just, it’s cool. I like it. It makes me happy. [00:21:00] Uh, also there’s some cycling features, which we care about not even a lick. Uh, don’t give a shit. So,

Jeff Ritter: Like cycling features, like riding a stationary or riding an outdoor bike? 

eD! Thomas: Shit if I know! My brain shut down the minute they were like, and here’s the exercise shit. It was like, nope.

This is, this 


Jeff Ritter: that’s, but, but watchOS 10 has additional cycling features.

eD! Thomas: does, it does.

Jeff Ritter: I actually have a friend who asks about this podcast quite often that is a cycling fan. I’m not talking about middle of the road spandex dickhead fan, but he enjoys riding his bike and would probably enjoy this additional function and feature. 

eD! Thomas: Know what? Because he listens and because he asks, I am going to tell you exactly what it is. First of all, it’s about general biking. Now you’ll be able to use the [00:22:00] Watch more like a bike computer. So when you start a cycling workout on the Watch, it’ll immediately show up as a Live Activity on your phone. So if you have your phone mounted to your bike, you can tap that and it’ll show you, uh, the workout view, which will show you, like, heart rate zones and your route… 

Jeff Ritter: Well, that’s awesome. Well,

eD! Thomas: It’ll connect to Bluetooth enabled sensors, like power meters and cadence sensors. Uh, which will let you watch your rotations per minute, and, this can be used to calculate your Functional Threshold Power, or FTP, which is a measure of your highest cycling output over the course of an hour.

Um, so the Watch uses that data to set up your personalized power zone so you can figure out, you know, I gotta be at 1 or 2, whatever, blah blah blah.

Jeff Ritter: Oh that’s pretty cool. 

eD! Thomas: Yeah, it’ll help you do zone training. This all sounds like I’m very knowledgeable. I’m literally reading it word for word from Wired. com. I didn’t 

Jeff Ritter: I tell you what, you 

eD! Thomas: get any, any like false hope.

All of

Jeff Ritter: You did well. I wish, if you didn’t, if you didn’t give that disclaimer, I don’t know if anybody would have realized.[00:23:00]

eD! Thomas: And hey, you know

Jeff Ritter: Except for the before when you said we don’t cycle, which we don’t.

eD! Thomas: We don’t, we don’t. I tried. I tried doing that. Uh, 

Jeff Ritter: I can, like, I can 

eD! Thomas: yeah, yeah, yeah, I can ride a bike, but you know what, here’s the thing, I was too stiff and gangly to, uh, be able to pull that off, so,. Maybe, maybe Stretch Zone will help with that.

Jeff Ritter: Stretch Zone, gonna get you back on the bike as they say.

eD! Thomas: Ho, ho, ho, ho, I see what you did there, and I appreciate it!

Jeff Ritter: There you go.

eD! Thomas: That’s spicy.

Jeff Ritter: Um, alright, so, covered the Watch, covered the watchOS, I’m getting an Ultra 2.

eD! Thomas: Let’s talk a little bit about bands, because there’s, uh, a couple of good things. First of all, Apple has said to Leather, “Hey! Screw off, pal. You’re, you’re not good for the environment.” So they’ve given the boot to leather and they’re coming out with something called FineWoven which is like a mix of recycled materials. It’s supposed to feel all fancy and shit. [00:24:00] So they’re gonna be they’re gonna be making a whole bunch of watch bands out of that.

Jeff Ritter: No 

eD! Thomas: Up the Ultras bands you used to be able to get the Alpine Loop in orange and black and I think it was white maybe? Now it’s in blue Um, Indigo, and I believe some ugly ass green.

The important one to me is that they have these swimmer depth loop thingy that’s kind of like a rubberized material that feels cool. That now comes in orange, so ya boy’s buying that. Uh, I’m very excited about it. Very, very excited.

Jeff Ritter: Can you use Watch bands from like the series 8, 7, this and that on the, on the Ultra if it’s the larger size? Okay.

eD! Thomas: Yeah, the 45mm one, or whatever the larger size one is, works on the Ultras. I haven’t run into one that doesn’t. So,

Jeff Ritter: Okay. [00:25:00] Yeah. Cause I have a couple. I don’t have a ton. Um, cause this, whatever this one is that, that flexible Sport Loop, whatever is awesome. So I’ve been using that the woven one.

eD! Thomas: Yeah. Yeah, uh, I I do love my Alpine Loop, but it is a pain in the ass to clean. Uh, and it gets dirty real easy. It’s upsetting because it’s orange and dope as hell.


Jeff Ritter: Yeah. No orange.

eD! Thomas: this guy in orange, it’ll be great.

Jeff Ritter: And when does that come out?

eD! Thomas: Those will be available starting on the 15th.

Jeff Ritter: Okay.

eD! Thomas: Oh, the Apple Watch is available for pre order today. Uh, and will be coming out, uh, I believe on the 22nd.

Jeff Ritter: Hey, I don’t know why I got that

eD! Thomas: You guys are very excited, 

It is, I, God, I am so good, I am right. Comes out on the 22nd and available for pre order now.

Jeff Ritter: Handsome and smart.

eD! Thomas: You. You know how to touch me right in the, right in the [00:26:00] old naughty bits.

Jeff Ritter: Right in the old stretch zone.

eD! Thomas: It’s true. It’s true.

Oh, I should also say the Watch is also now available, the lower end Watch is available in this very dull pink. And otherwise, it doesn’t matter.

Jeff Ritter: doesn’t, that doesn’t matter. What color is the Ultra? The Ultra’s only silver.

eD! Thomas: “Titanium” is technically the color of it. So if you have, like, a metal watch band that’s in silver, it doesn’t really work. Which drives people, uh, that I know, named Ed, that are me, insane.

Jeff Ritter: That would drive me nuts if they don’t match.

eD! Thomas: Infuriates… Do you know how much I spent for these things? They were expensive as hell and I can’t use them anymore!

That’s the only reason

Jeff Ritter: That would drive me fucking 

eD! Thomas: Handy. In case if I’m going to like a wedding where I need to look like a fancy, fancy boy. Uh,

Jeff Ritter: That would drive me fucking crazy.

eD! Thomas: It’s infuriating. It is

Jeff Ritter: And if I’m going back to… A non colored, I’ll [00:27:00] call that non colored because I’ve had red and blue now for the last few years. If I’m going back to like a, a more traditional color, I do want a metal band. So I will wait and get one that matches the, get one that matches the ultra.

eD! Thomas: I’ve never seen one.

Jeff Ritter: Oh, they don’t have ones that do.

eD! Thomas: Nope. Cause you know, you know

Jeff Ritter: I’ll just get black.

eD! Thomas: I would just buy it. 

Jeff Ritter: Yeah, I just thought, I thought you might’ve had ones from older ones that were just slightly different metal, you know, slightly different color metal than black it is. I don’t have to get a black

eD! Thomas: Uh, the bands that it comes with, of the bands that it comes with, I do like the Alpine Loop the best, but the uh, whatever this one is, I forget the name of it. Uh, it’s puffy, it looks cool as hell. See if I can find it real fast so I can, uh, tell you.


Jeff Ritter: I’m going to check out. So this FineWoven is supposed to be fancy.

eD! Thomas: This FineWoven is supposed to be fancy, but the Apple Watch Ultra, [00:28:00] um, they call it the Ocean Band. That’s what it is. You can choose between the Alpine Loop, the Trail Loop, or the Ocean Band as the one that comes bundled with the Watch. I don’t believe you can choose any other band.

Jeff Ritter: Okay. Then a cheap third party black or black and brown leather. It will be for fancy days.

eD! Thomas: There you go. Or you can just buy a FineWoven for nine million dollars. I think, I think they’re 99 bucks. So whatever. Heh.

Jeff Ritter: I’ll buy two for 8 because I’ll wear them once every other year.

eD! Thomas: Right, right, right. Checks out. So, uh, you want to talk a little iPhone?

Jeff Ritter: I do.

eD! Thomas: Alright, let’s talk a little iPhone. Obviously,

Jeff Ritter: Wow. We’re already at iPhone or oh wait. Okay. Wow. So that no, no iPads anticipate, although iPads don’t usually come out…

eD! Thomas: [00:29:00] iPads, iPads are usually a second event in October. 

Jeff Ritter: Yeah. They announced those goggles already. Uh, what else? What about audio stuff? Like AirPods or HomePods or anything?

eD! Thomas: We’ll get to that. And the only reason that this is going to tie into the audio stuff is because the change is very minor to the AirPods. And it’s only one set of AirPods and I’m furious about it. So we’ll get there. Um, so let’s start with the iPhone 15 and 15 Plus, first of all, they’ve killed the Mini.

Uh, you can’t even get the 13 mini anymore, which they had last year. Uh, if you want an iPhone, it is a shame. That was such a dope phone.

Jeff Ritter: My, my daughter has the 13 mini and it is perfect.

eD! Thomas: It’s a beautiful, it’s a great phone! I know tons of people with tiny little hands! They need a tiny little phone! Ya monsters, ya sacks of shit. So, the iPhones 15. Uh, first we have the 15 1 or 6. 7 inches diagonally, [00:30:00] um, comes in, drumroll please for the exciting colors…

Jeff Ritter: there it is.

eD! Thomas: black, green, yellow, and pink, all of them really bland pastel style colors, horrifying.

Jeff Ritter: Need a favor. 

eD! Thomas: yeah,

Jeff Ritter: Uh, go through those colors again. Cause you said black and I just started laughing and I didn’t hear any of the other ones. I heard them. I didn’t pay enough

eD! Thomas: okay, okay, okay, it’s uh, blue, like a very light sky blue, a very light green, a very light yellow, and a very light pink.

Jeff Ritter: Oh, so it’s all like all pastel stuff. Got it. Okay.

eD! Thomas: Not happy about it. I want it there to be like, so I want them to go back to bright ass colors. Like I want the 5C color style with this shit. Come on, Apple, get your life together.

Jeff Ritter: yeah. Yeah. What are you guys doing?

eD! Thomas: pieces of [00:31:00] garbage.

Jeff Ritter: That’s such a fucking that’s such like a come see come saw fucking color there.

eD! Thomas: I like to call

Jeff Ritter: what a waffling

eD! Thomas: “Might as well have gone with white” is the 

Jeff Ritter: Yeah, that’s like oh, it’s a good It’s like a slightly bluish tinted white.

eD! Thomas: Yeah,

Jeff Ritter: Nah, fuck that.

eD! Thomas: It’s gross. 

Jeff Ritter: I want like a cobalt blue.

eD! Thomas: Yes Hold that thought. So it, it has the A16 chip that was introduced in the iPhone 14 Pro line last year, as, as, as they do. So anything that I said about the iPhone 14 Pro last year, straight up here, same processors there. Also, uh, although it’s only two cameras, it is, got the same 48 megapixel, um, main camera that the iPhone 14 Pro had.

Jeff Ritter: Okay.

eD! Thomas: Now just to go back, you remember I was talking about how they, uh, were talking about all their environmental things, and one [00:32:00] of the things they were talking about was how much, uh, recycling materials they were doing. The cool part about that is that the battery is actually using recycled cobalt, which…

Jeff Ritter: Oh, 

eD! Thomas: is awesome because that, you know, means less children dying mining cobalt. Another thing that they recycled was almost word for word their description of the cameras. Uh, from the 14 Pro into the 15. So, I’m going to just cut in here with what I said last year about the 14 Pro camera:

Now it combines every four pixels into one bigger pixel. So the shooting mode will still be 12 megapixels in regular mode, but it’s going to take in so much more light that low light isn’t going to suck ass anymore. It’s gonna be dope. Also. It allows for, uh, you know, how you have like a 0.5 wide and then one, and then three as your zooms?

There’s now going to be a two times mode where they take the 48 megapixel and just crop in the middle. And [00:33:00]it will zoom to being two times size. It’s gonna be awesome.

Jeff Ritter: Listen, if they can command C, command V, the presentation, you can do that to the podcast.

eD! Thomas: But yeah, basically the same thing. Uh, the new iPhones can reach a peak brightness of 2, 000 nits in bright sunlight, which is twice as bright as the iPhone 14.

Jeff Ritter: Okay.

eD! Thomas: And the big change, two big changes, actually.

Let’s go with two big changes. One, these now have the Dynamic Islands, so people might actually start doing things with them. Who knows?

Jeff Ritter: That’d be nice. They have this Dynamic Island, like shit pops up and like I go to tap on it to get to whatever, like when you, when you put your, when you’re putting an AirPod in with a Dynamic Island and it shows you, I’d like to tap on it and bring me to like the fucking, you know, the battery or the status of it does nothing.

Dynamic Island. Idiot. Sorry, it

eD! Thomas: All right. That’s right. [00:34:00] The other thing that it has is now it’s got USB C instead of Lightning.

Jeff Ritter: Yes. Yeah,

eD! Thomas: I know this isn’t going to be mainly for people that listen to this podcast because you’ve heard things about this from me before, but because you listen to this podcast, you are going to have to be The Person that explains to your less intelligent friends that go, “Oh, Apple’s just doing this as a cash grab”, that this is not a cash grab by Apple.

They’re going to make less money now, because there was a program to get the chips to do Lightning, so you had to give them cold, hard money to make accessories that were, uh, certified as being made for the iPhone. 

Jeff Ritter: Which was that, yeah, MFI for you dummies.

eD! Thomas: Now any old dumb shit USB C shit will work, and that’s all coming to a head because the, uh, EU said all the phones have to have, uh, USB C connectors starting next year. So technically they could have gotten away with this [00:35:00] phone being Lightning, but they wanted to do it on their timetable. Dammit. So they did.

The 15 is still locked at the same USB 2. 0 speeds. So if you’re expecting to transfer your stuff off faster, eat shit. You’ve got nothing.

Jeff Ritter: You’re not getting that 

eD! Thomas: you


Jeff Ritter: not giving away the form. 

eD! Thomas: No, no, they’re sitting there. They’re looking at you dead in the eye and telling you to eat their butts. And not in a pleasant way.

Jeff Ritter: Yeah. Not the, not the way you want it.

eD! Thomas: No, no, not at all. Hey, speaking of the iPhone 15s though, here’s a nice bit of business that, you remember how I talked about that second generation Ultra Wideband chip that’s in the watches, that’s also going to be in the 15s. So what this enables is, uh, a further distance from the other Ultra Wideband things, you can, uh, start picking things up sooner and it’ll also add in, I think where you can use Find My Friends [00:36:00] and actually track them if they have an iPhone 15 or an Apple Watch Series 9 or Ultra 2, and track them through, like, you know, wherever you are to go find them in a stadium or in the case of what I’m excited about, my frickin mother, who always disappears when we’re in Target together, like, I turn around for a second, and next thing you know, she’s halfway across the store…

Jeff Ritter: you have to stop hiding inside the clothes racks like you did when you were a kid.

eD! Thomas: I have to do no such thing. She should know to look for me. 

Jeff Ritter: Well she can now.

eD! Thomas: That’s true. She’ll be, I’ll be easier to find. It’ll be great. Ha ha

Jeff Ritter: I’m just gonna hunt my friends down like, like, fucking most dangerous game. Haha.

eD! Thomas: ha. 

Jeff Ritter: Haha. 

eD! Thomas: Also, the, uh, Apple will, the Apple, the Apple, they are partnering with AAA so that if you need roadside assistance and you have no signal, you can do it by satellite.

Jeff Ritter: That’s 

eD! Thomas: Yeah, it’s pretty dope.

Jeff Ritter: I like that. That’s, that’s a nice feature.

eD! Thomas: So that’s, that’s basically it. You can start [00:37:00] pre ordering it this Friday. And it’ll be delivered on the 22nd. Starts at 7. 99 for 128 gigs of deliciousness.

Jeff Ritter: Okay.

eD! Thomas: Alright? So 

Jeff Ritter: Damn, I got to figure out. All right. So that’s, but that’s just the, that’s the regular one, which we, we both know neither of us are 

eD! Thomas: Of course not. No. No. We’re gonna get the big boy phone. We’re gonna get the Pro. The Pro. Like, the champions we are. Speaking of which… Uh, we’re gonna take a quick pause and I’m gonna talk about the AirPods now. Because, here’s the deal with the AirPods, the AirPods Pro 2 have now been re released with a USB C connection instead of Lightning, for charging.

Which is cool, but these pieces of shit aren’t apparently releasing just the case to buy if you already have the AirPods Pro 2. So I still have to carry around a frickin Lightning cable just to charge my goddamn AirPods.

Jeff Ritter: So it’s just the [00:38:00] case?

eD! Thomas: Just the case.

Jeff Ritter: Just the case. That’s so stupid. Okay. Well, I will tell you this. I feel good about that because my, you know, with, with the AirPods or the AirPod Pros, I think no matter which generation you have, they all do the MagSafe charging.

eD! Thomas: Yes.

Jeff Ritter: Which is how I charge mine anyway, so I don’t have to worry about that so much.

eD! Thomas: Right, but

Jeff Ritter: Okay.

eD! Thomas: you can also use the USB C port on your iPhone to charge your AirPods.

Jeff Ritter: Jesus. Okay. So is that only if you have the USB C case or can you use the USB C port on a USB C to Lightning to charge the old

eD! Thomas: You know, I don’t know. That’s a good question. I know you can use, you can also charge your Apple Watch that way, so you could use the Apple Watch charger, and if you have the AirPods Pro 2, the Apple Watch charger is supposed to [00:39:00] work on that wirelessly, so that could work. Unfortunately, I have my AirPods in a case, uh, that has been screwing up the wireless charging, so I’m just boned.

Jeff Ritter: I just took mine out of the case. I fucking hated that I couldn’t see if it was charging or not.

I, you know,

eD! Thomas: I, I’m gonna try to figure out how to get these out of the case, I think. Which sucks, because I like this case, but…

Jeff Ritter: have a, I have an awesome, like a blue silicone Rick Sanchez case.

eD! Thomas: Nice.

Jeff Ritter: He’s just on the front. It’s not shaped like him or anything. Uh, but it was fucking up. I had to get rid of it.

eD! Thomas: I, I have this expensive ass dbrand one. That looks awesome. Screws up my wireless charging. I can’t do it. I gotta take it out. I 

Jeff Ritter: Fuck. Gotta go.


eD! Thomas: you’re telling me it’s gotta go? It’s gotta go. 

Jeff Ritter: It has to go. You’re a big boy. You don’t need a case on those 

eD! Thomas: You’re right. You are right.

Jeff Ritter: You got this.

If they break, you have to get the ones with the [00:40:00] USB C on the bottom. Anyway, get rid of that fucking case.

eD! Thomas: And I’d be able to get it with a new Memoji on it that has shorter hair.

Jeff Ritter: That’s a good point.

eD! Thomas: It’s a good point. Yeah. It’s an 

Jeff Ritter: That might be enough reason to have to get those 

eD! Thomas: Honestly, it might be. It might be. I like the way you’re thinking. So let’s talk about iPhone 15 Pro real quick. And by real quick, I mean for like four hours. First of all, you know how, all the iPhone Pros have had stainless steel things on the outside, which makes it heavy. It’s very fingerprinty and super annoying. Well, now, hashtag call back to my nipples. They’re made of titanium.

Jeff Ritter: Oh, look at you, like Old McDonald, the farmer, you plant a seed, you watch it grow, EIEIO, my friend, good work.

eD! Thomas: Thank you. I appreciate you recognizing the game that I’ve been

Jeff Ritter: I’m impressed, I’m impressed, you planned that one out, [00:41:00]

eD! Thomas: did. I did. It 

Jeff Ritter: well done, 

eD! Thomas: it’s been good. It’s been a good time. I comes, it comes in the following colors. Another drumroll for exciting color choices. We’ve got black titanium,

Jeff Ritter: Okay. Wait a sec. What’s black titanium?

eD! Thomas: it’s just, it’s black. It’s black.

Jeff Ritter: Okay.

eD! Thomas: But the, the titanium is color matched to the black, so

Jeff Ritter: Got it. Okay. Great.

eD! Thomas: Uh, they’ve got white titanium.

Jeff Ritter: Okay.

eD! Thomas: And then they’ve got, they’re calling it Natural Titanium, but I’m calling it Titanium Titanium. 


Jeff Ritter: Oh, Yeah. Natural titanium. Okay. Just regular S. So that’s just great. Like, like a grayish, like a type. Okay.

eD! Thomas: Yeah. And Blue Titanium.

Jeff Ritter: Okay. Let me have this. Let me have it on the blue. What, what kind of blue are we talking

eD! Thomas: We’re talking a [00:42:00] dark blue.

Jeff Ritter: Like dark blue, like the, like the new MacBook air blue.

eD! Thomas: I don’t think it’s that blue. But in the, in the press photos, you can tell it’s blue.

Jeff Ritter: Ooh, Hey. 


eD! Thomas: Yeah. It’s not, it’s not like every other year where it’s just, “Hey, this is gray, but if you put it in the right light, it might be blue or purple.” No, this looks like it. Yeah. Yeah. It might actually just be dope ass blue.

Jeff Ritter: You’re thinking blue. Okay. I gotta tell you, so I’m a little disappointed, but not, I love my purple that I have now.

eD! Thomas: Me too.

Jeff Ritter: I fucking love it. Okay, so now that, that’s outta the way. So I’m not sure here, but I think I, I think I’m about to fuck you up a little bit. Did you already pre-order your phone?

eD! Thomas: Well, I didn’t pre order it. You can’t really pre order it yet, but you can do like the, if you have the iPhone Upgrade Program, you basically get it all set. So you press one button on Friday.

Jeff Ritter: Did you do that yet?[00:43:00]

eD! Thomas: Yes.

Jeff Ritter: Did you go with the blue?

eD! Thomas: Is water wet? Of course I did.

Jeff Ritter: I’m going with the white.

eD! Thomas: Really?

Jeff Ritter: Bob Ross used to paint with Titanium White. I’m going with 

eD! Thomas: That’s true. That’s true. He did play with titanium white.

Jeff Ritter: I’m sorry to do that to you. I hope I don’t, I hope I didn’t mess you up.

eD! Thomas: You didn’t.

Jeff Ritter: But I’m, I’m going 

eD! Thomas: I, I gotta be honest with you. And I mean this in from the very bottom of my heart. You would no way change the color of my iPhone choices. Um, you just can’t. You can’t. You can’t. 

Jeff Ritter: I thought Bob, I thought Bob might. 

As an homage, I thought Bob 

eD! Thomas: As much as I love Bob, and you know he is my life coach and 

Jeff Ritter: I, that’s why, that’s why I didn’t want to say it.

eD! Thomas: my heart belongs more to Superman. And Spider-Man. And that’s [00:44:00] blue.

Jeff Ritter: Listen, you’re a man of principle, and I’m happy. I’m very glad that I didn’t mess you up, because I thought, if I said it, I’d say, oh, I hope he doesn’t, uh, I hope I don’t put him into some sort of spiral. Stick to your guns, go with the blue. I’m going titanium white. Unless my wife goes titanium white, then I’ll go blue.

Because we constantly are picking up each other’s phones by accident. It’s fucking annoying.

eD! Thomas: You can’t have the same color phone. But I also, give me a minute, there might be another thing that’ll differentiate your phones when we get there. Um,

Jeff Ritter: Okay. All right.

eD! Thomas: So again, these, these phones have USB C. These ones though, you can get up to 10 gigabits of data transfer as opposed to like the 480 megabytes of USB

Jeff Ritter: That’s, that’s so crazy slow. That’s like slower than wifi sometimes.

eD! Thomas: 2. Uh, so this way [00:45:00] you can get your ProRes videos or Normal Videos if You’re Not Shooting ProRes Because You’re Not a Lunatic, off your phone quickly. Um, it also has, uh, Q two compatible mag safe charging. And you might be asking yourself what’s the difference? And the answer is, I don’t know. And I also don’t really care.

So whatever. I think it’s, I think it’s I think

Jeff Ritter: very expensive chargers that are staying where they are. They charge charges plenty fast for me right now.

eD! Thomas: Here’s another thing that this iPhone has. The other one doesn’t. You ready for this? So, you know how the iPhone has the mute switch?

Jeff Ritter: Yeah.

eD! Thomas: Not anymore. Not, not the iPhone 15 Pro. They’ve replaced it with a button. An Action Button, much like on the Apple Watch Ultra. Except on the Apple Watch Ultra, it’s orange and cool, and on here, it’s whatever the color of the titanium is, which is upsetting.

I would like it to be orange. And,

Jeff Ritter: Would like a [00:46:00] little bit of pop too. 

eD! Thomas: Yeah, right? Yeah, like, give me some color, guys. Geez, it’s not that hard. So you press and hold it, and it’ll switch you from, uh, silent mode to ring mode. But you can also assign it to do things like turn on your flashlight, open your camera apps, run a Shortcut, uh, go to the accessibility tools.

Jeff Ritter: So, it went from being completely useless, because my phone has not been off of silence since I got an Apple Watch, to being quite possibly extremely useful.

eD! Thomas: Extremely useful!

Jeff Ritter: Extremely useful, especially if it’s programmable.

eD! Thomas: Yeah.

Jeff Ritter: You know, it’s funny. I was going to mention to you before, you know, like that, that, uh, like the triple tap feature. So it’s a little sketchy. I haven’t really mastered what the three taps are, but if I just keep, like, if I want to open the, I have it set for the Control Center.

eD! Thomas: Mm hmm.

Jeff Ritter: And so if I just keep fucking, if I just keep going to tap a tap a tap a tap, I eventually open the Control Center, and I fucking [00:47:00] love that. So this button, forget it. Fuh get uh bout it. Because if I can use that button to get to Control Center, I can turn off the three tap, so I stop accidentally going to fucking Control Center.

Oh, doggy. I love that feature. So I’m, I, and I forget what do they, what do they call, what do they call it? Like when they make a really like massive change to the iPhone.

eD! Thomas: Draining Ed’s bank account?

Jeff Ritter: Yeah, well, there’s that, but no, I, I forget. There’s like a very specific term and I’ll hopefully, hopefully I’ll remember what it is, but like, you know, they, they, A guy that we used to work with, that went to work for Apple out in wherever, Arizona, California, something like that, he used to say, and I don’t think they follow this as much anymore, but they used to do, um, Revision Revolution.

So like, Every

eD! Thomas: is what you’re 

Jeff Ritter: [00:48:00] so like every every you would go, you know S you know, you went 6 to 6S But then the 7 was a bit I would say that this is more than a 14 Pro S big time 

eD! Thomas: And we’re not, we’re not even to the big time part yet.

Jeff Ritter: Oh god bless. All right. Let me shut up here. So

eD! Thomas: So, uh, obviously it’s using the new A17 Pro chip, cause that’s what they do in the new ones, which is much more power efficient. It’s got an updated GPU. The GPU includes, uh, something called hardware accelerated ray tracing, which is going to make games look dope as shit. If you’re into that sort of thing, they have the console versions of Resident Evil running on this phone. So I will actually be playing Resident Evil again. And the storage capacities are 128, 256, 512, and 1TB for the Pro and the Pro Max starts at 256 and you can go to 512 or 1TB. There’s no 128.

Jeff Ritter: Okay.[00:49:00]

eD! Thomas: Let’s talk about the thing that always makes my heart sing. Let’s, let’s talk some cameras.

Jeff Ritter: Let’s do it. 

That is very important to me, as you know.,

eD! Thomas: The main camera remains a 48 megapixel sensor, it takes a 24 megapixel image by default, with, you know, using binning, where it combines pixels to get more light. You can also do a three times zoom with the telephoto lens on the regular Pro, but on the Pro Max, it will go to a five times zoom because they have a new little weird bit of business where it basically takes the light and shoots it around like a little lightning bolt through a series of prisms so that it gets more information, and doesn’t protrude any more. It’s supposed, it’s supposed to be like a, uh, 122mm lens, which made my [00:50:00] friend, who’s very big in photography all caps text me, “Why is this phone going to be so expensive? I’m not up for a phone upgrade this year.”

Jeff Ritter: That’s, well, that’s, that’s good to hear, although a little disheartening because last year the Pro and the Max had the same exact

eD! Thomas: Uh huh. Yeah.

Jeff Ritter: I do not want to go back to the Max at all.

eD! Thomas: Well, I’ve got bad news for you, girl.

Jeff Ritter: Oh my God, this is bad, this is getting, this is really, this is really going south for me right 

eD! Thomas: Yeah. Uh, it’s, it’s, it’s, it’s… That zoom alone is, I mean, I was gonna stick with the max anyway. I’ve done it for three years. I, I enjoy it when somebody picks up my phone and goes, your phone’s so big. I’m like, well never hear that before. Never gonna hear that again about anything else other than my 

Jeff Ritter: trust me, it’s only the phone, people.

eD! Thomas: Yeah. Is there a phone in your pocket? You’re just happy to see me? I assure you it is just the phone. [00:51:00] I’m not 

Jeff Ritter: a big phone, but it is just the phone.

eD! Thomas: Yeah. Even if I was happy to see you, you’d never know it. There’s going to be better processing of smart HDR. They did a whole bunch of demos on how dope that’s going to look.

It looks cool. I want it. Um, yeah, so that zoom, that zoom is really what’s got me going, cause, uh, that’s gonna be awesome. Oh, hey, here’s another thing. Here’s another thing that I forgot about that I got really excited about. So you know when you’re in portrait mode, and you forget to come out of portrait mode, and you’re like, “you son of a bitch,” and then you have to go swipe around?

You don’t have to do that anymore! Uh, you can take portrait mode photos with the regular thing. You can just take a regular photo and it will do all the depth information later on. You can edit it so that it’ll be in portrait mode.

Jeff Ritter: Really, is that only on the Macs, or is that on the


also? No. Oh, thank

eD! Thomas: I think that might also be on the 15, but I,

Jeff Ritter: Those, hold on, hold on, hold on,[00:52:00]

I don’t want to be rude. Don’t, we’re done with that. Those people, you’re done. You guys had your time. Buy your, buy your fucking introductory phone that my, my children have and see yourself the fuck out. We’re talking about the Pro now. So.

eD! Thomas: Oh, yeah. Um, it’ll have improved low light, uh, because it’s got big ass pixels. Just like, just like, you know, oh my god, this, this camera looks like it’s going to be awesome. I’m going to take it with me to Peru and it’s going to be dope as hell. And that’s all I know. That’s all I

Jeff Ritter: very excited for you. I’m very excited. I’m a little bummed about the zoom, but I think I’m going to live with it. We’ll see.

eD! Thomas: No, I think you’re going to get the, the big boy. I absolutely believe you’re going to get the big boy. I’m going to tell you right now. And you know why I think that? Because it’s going to eat at your brain for the next 24 hours. And you’ll be like, oh, Think of how many cool ass [00:53:00] shots you could get of G playing lacrosse all across a field.

You’re gonna sit there, you’re just gonna be like, look, uh, I could have done… So much cool shit if I had this big phone and I don’t want the big phone. I don’t want the big phone. Are you kidding me? I, I like, yeah, I want the big phone, but I don’t want the big phone. You know what I mean? Like that makes sense to you where I 

Jeff Ritter: I do. I 

that makes, yeah, it makes exact

eD! Thomas: You’re, you, you don’t buy the big phone because you… Need the big phone. You buy the big phone because you’ve given up on not having the best, and you deserve the best. You’re gonna end up getting the big one. Mark 

Jeff Ritter: That’s a fucking, that’s a, that’s a hard sales pitch right there.

eD! Thomas: I don’t make a commission on this, by the way, people. I’m just saying what I believe.

Jeff Ritter: That is a 

eD! Thomas: You deserve, You deserve, the big one. You’re gonna be getting pictures of G playing lacrosse, and Juliana doing like cheerleading from like far out! You’re gonna have to get, like, zoom in and shit. You’re gonna be amazed at the pictures you’re gonna get now because you have the big phone [00:54:00] because you are not a wuss.

Jeff Ritter: Wow. That’s, that’s a stern talking to, by the way.

eD! Thomas: I don’t have this much passion about almost 

Jeff Ritter: passionate. You’re very passionate about this.

eD! Thomas: I, I, I do not, I believe you will be worse off if you get the regular one and you will regret it every day until next 

Jeff Ritter: Can I ask you something?

eD! Thomas: Go

Jeff Ritter: Is there a way, is there a way that we can, you know, if you transcribe this, I want you to have this same talk with my children, but let’s just substitute like the phone for not doing drugs, because it’s a, it’s an impassioned

eD! Thomas: I 

I don’t even need, 

Jeff Ritter: be able to keep my kids on the straight and narrow.

eD! Thomas: Oh, I absolutely can. 

Jeff Ritter: Now, I don’t believe, I don’t believe a word about not doing, not doing drugs, 

eD! Thomas: Listen, I’m not going to tell them not to smoke weed, but I will 

Jeff Ritter: They’ve, they’ve gotta.

eD! Thomas: I will stop them 

Jeff Ritter: good. That’s fair. Yeah, that’s fair. They’re going to have to find out on their own that that weed is [00:55:00]awesome. Um, I’m not telling them

eD! Thomas: You can’t go and 

Jeff Ritter: Find out just like I did. Yeah.

Just like I, just like I found out they’re going to

eD! Thomas: They’ll watch Clerks and then be 

Jeff Ritter: both ways to school.

eD! Thomas: What’s going on here? Yeah, no, it’ll be fine. No, I promise you, if you let me sit down with your children, they will never do black tar heroin.

Jeff Ritter: That’s really, I was, that’s, that’s really where I’m going for. I feel like if, if my kids are on heroin or meth, I probably failed as a parent.

eD! Thomas: Yeah, no, I can, I can stop them. I can do this exact same speech. 

Jeff Ritter: We’re in. 

eD! Thomas: I, I can tell them stories about like, Oh, do you want to be like, you know, some of the people I knew having to wake up to go haul in totes at CVS? No, you don’t.

Jeff Ritter: Do you want to get a regular iPhone like the rest of the fucking meth heads out there?

eD! Thomas: Do 

Jeff Ritter: don’t want a pro? Like

eD! Thomas: do you want to have a two year old iPhone?

Jeff Ritter: Enjoy your iPhone 14, you fucking junkie. You know, [00:56:00] is that, that’s, that’s how I, that’s how I keep them. That’s how I keep them off the streets. So, um, all right, back to the actual, back to the actual phone. What else? Anything that we, anything that wasn’t mentioned, anything that wasn’t?

eD! Thomas: Not that I can think of right now. Uh, now I’m, now, now my, now my brain is just, my brain is completely smooth and I’m just thinking about how I’m going to tell your children not to do

Jeff Ritter: This is your brain on, this is your brain on drugs, bud. I’m excited. I, uh, USB C is fantastic. A slightly lighter phone. Weigh in on this. Is this a phone that needs a case? Have we gotten there yet?

eD! Thomas: I’m still getting a case. Uh, I’m not happy about it but I did order one. Um, I would like to think, it is supposed to be, it’s got the ceramic glass front, it’s got a stronger glass back, it is much more repairable, that is another thing that I should have probably brought up. Um, 

Jeff Ritter: You just did. 

eD! Thomas: [00:57:00] See?

Boom. Nailed it. 

Jeff Ritter: at you.

eD! Thomas: Uh, this

Jeff Ritter: You’re fucking killing. Oh, hold on a second. You’re killing it by the way. I’ve been, I’ve fucking derailed you left and right and you bring us, you bring us right back like a ski lift taking us to the top of the mountain. So you’re killing it by the way. 

eD! Thomas: Thank you. 

Jeff Ritter: it. Sorry. I 

eD! Thomas: it Don’t you even bother. Don’t you even bother worrying about that, my friend. Uh. What were we talking about? Uh, no, there’s 

Jeff Ritter: You’re talking about the durability, the glass,

eD! Thomas: that’s right. Okay. So the glasses, uh, the front glass is the ceramic coated glass that was also on the iPhone 14 pro, which I don’t know if it was more scratch resistant because I had a screen protector on it and I gotta be honest with you, I hated the entire year that I had a screen protector on it.

Jeff Ritter: this is the first fucking, uh, this, the 14 Pro is the first fucking phone that I’ve scratched the screen.

eD! Thomas: See, that’s what happened with me with the 13.

Jeff Ritter: I never use a screen protector. I don’t have one on here. This is the first one that I’ve got a bit of a [00:58:00]scratch on, but I gotta tell ya, I have to tell ya, despite that, I have never treated a phone as fucking poorly as this one. Like, I don’t drop phones, not this phone is fucking falling all the time.

Like I’ll fall asleep it in my hand and drop it off the side of the bed. And, and this thing has taken a lick and kept on ticking, except for that one scratch. I do think I might put a screen protector on the next one because the scratch drove me fucking crazy.

eD! Thomas: Yeah, that’s my problem too. But then the screen protector drives me crazy too, because I can’t ever get it straight. And then it hurts.

Jeff Ritter: Yeah. Uh, if you want to put a screen protector on, um, my wife, I don’t know how she does it is a fucking master at putting screen protectors on. Seamless. it. She’s awesome at it. But, so I’ll give it a try. Worst comes to worst, I’ll peel the thing off. [00:59:00] Would I wish? Do you remember, I think it was the iPhone 5 or something.

Did you remember they like, screwed up with the antennas? And so they gave you those 

eD! Thomas: was the, that was the four.

Jeff Ritter: That was the 4?

eD! Thomas: That was the four.

Jeff Ritter: Damn, that was a long time ago. That’s what I want. Just give me a bumper to

eD! Thomas: the antenna array went, uh, there was a little bump at the end. There’s a little notch here. And then if your hand held it,

Jeff Ritter: Everybody, just just so 

eD! Thomas: out, I just pulled an iPhone 4 out from behind me. Uh,

Jeff Ritter: I, when I tell you guys, he didn’t even roll his chair. He spun it and an iPhone 4 appeared. This thing was at the ready. I don’t even know where, but this thing was at the ready.

eD! Thomas: an iPhone 6 too, I got one right here. 

Jeff Ritter: I, I have one of those, but I wish I had a 4. That was the best

eD! Thomas: I, I had a second one of these, too, that I was holding onto, but then the battery exploded. [01:00:00]

Jeff Ritter: Yeah. Well, that’s Yeah. that’s yeah, you don’t want 

eD! Thomas: No. No. So I gave that one right to, uh, Best Buy to recycle. Yeah, that, that had a problem where if you touched the little, uh, line that was in the antenna, the reception died, which was already a problem because it was AT& T.

So, you were 

Jeff Ritter: Yep. And I can’t for the best. I like, yeah, no, I know we messed up here. Put this piece of rubber around the phone and you’ll be all right. However, I do wish, and maybe they do, somebody’s got to make it. I just want the bumper just to keep for when I drop it, so that the corners don’t smash and so that it raises the screen when I put it face down.

That’s protect the screen and protect the camera, but I don’t want the whole goddamn slippery phone that it’s annoying.

eD! Thomas: Yeah, and also it just looks so, the phone itself is so dope looking, [01:01:00] like it is a, it is a genuine crime that I have to put a case on these phones.

Jeff Ritter: I think I’m gonna try raw dog in this next phone Let’s see 

eD! Thomas: you’re a braver man than I.

Jeff Ritter: Yeah, I’m gonna, I’m gonna try.

eD! Thomas: You know what, I will tell you dbrand, who made the thing that I was just complaining about, but I love all the rest of the stuff I’ve ever bought from them, that’s the only thing that I’ve ever been disappointed in. So I want to put that out there first. They just announced today a new clear case, that apparently never yellows, that basically is, is a very much like a bumper, but also, I mean, it’s still a little case, but it’s supposed to be

Jeff Ritter: Okay. Is there any chance, is that called like the ghost case? 

eD! Thomas: it is.

Jeff Ritter: I saw, did they say that it was something like you’ll, you’ll die before this yellows or some shit like that? That’s, let me tell you something. That’s the type of upfront advertising I need. Like, let, you let me know. I don’t want you to tell me I’ll be [01:02:00] fucking dead before this comes out.

And I’m like, all right, good. Um, that’s, I’ll take

eD! Thomas: Yeah. I love their advertising. I 

Jeff Ritter: what is it? D brand like?

eD! Thomas: Like, the letter D and brand is one word. Uh, they’re, they’re a Canadian company. They also make the best screen protectors I’ve ever used, and I mean, I don’t use them frequently, but like, while I was waiting for them to ship, I got some, uh, Zag screen protectors, and they were fine, but these ones are just beautiful.

Jeff Ritter: Yeah. Zag is a drag.

eD! Thomas: Nice. Good one. You should, you should email them, uh, dbrand and be like, yo, you should use this. They’ll, they will respond. You’d be like, eat shit, fat boy. We’re going to steal that from you. You get nothing. 

Jeff Ritter: I’m like, I told you you should use it. You assholes. Just send me a ghost case that doesn’t yellow until I’m 

eD! Thomas: Yeah, they’ll be like, nah, how about you die instead? I love them so much. I love them and their marketing. It’s wonderful. No,

Jeff Ritter: I feel like you have a, you’re, you’re painting them in a very negative light though.

eD! Thomas: No, no, no. They, they [01:03:00] have absolutely awesome customer service. Their products are great, but they’re, they’re monsters. They are just so mean. It’s awesome. It’s, it’s, they’re mean the way that you and I are mean, like, you know,

Jeff Ritter: Remember that restaurant Dick’s last resort? Where you just went in they treat you like shit like that’s like that

eD! Thomas: Very much, very much so.

Jeff Ritter: or Dave’s life

eD! Thomas: Yeah, basically the way we treat Dave is the way that they treat their customers. And just like Dave, we also, they’re like, this is hilarious. They’re like, no, we have actual legitimate disdain for you. We’re like, nah, you’re fine.

Jeff Ritter: You know, we hate you. No, I know. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it’s funny stuff. All right. Well, there you go

eD! Thomas: Look at that. I can order this case with the screen protector for the low, low price of 69. 90.

Jeff Ritter: oh, that’s not that bad, dude. I thought you I thought you were about to tell me the low low price of like [01:04:00] 180.

eD! Thomas: that still would be fine. Um, no, no, no, no. 

Jeff Ritter: Yeah, but that’s that’s a much higher low low price 69. You don’t even have

eD! Thomas: No, no, that was sincere. I think that’s a low price. I just bought a case for

Jeff Ritter: no

eD! Thomas: 59 without a screen protector.

Jeff Ritter: A decent a decent case. I mean you can get you know, cheap cases, but they get slippery as fuck. The yellow you’re replacing them every couple of months. Anyway, if this one’s going to last you a bit, it’s, it’s more worth it than it already is worth it because it already is worth it apparently.

eD! Thomas: And I’ve had my 14 wrapped in their other case this whole year, and it’s been awesome.

Jeff Ritter: Okay.

eD! Thomas: Just, just, and I’ve dropped this phone, like, when I was taking, I was taking a shower at some point, I put the phone down, uh, where the sink is, but I precariously balanced it and somebody text messaged me and it fell down.

Nothing. No problem. Whatsoever.

Jeff Ritter: Okay.

eD! Thomas: Totally, totally endorsed. The only [01:05:00] downside is that it will only ship in October. Which, all right, fine.

Jeff Ritter: You gotta buy one of those 10 cases that yellows in a month. This way it yellows and you throw it in the garbage when your phone, new one comes.

eD! Thomas: exactly. You just take it, you toss it in the toilet, you flush your toilet, you then call the plumber to fix your problem. Gonna cost you 75, 000,

Jeff Ritter: Hey, I was just gonna say 800 later and you’re good to go.

eD! Thomas: easy peasy, hey, did I tell you? Unrelated to iPhones, that, one of the pipes in my bathroom broke, and it was shooting water up, like, you know how in a cartoon, like, you’ll see somebody get hit in the face with water, and it’s hilarious? It is so much less funny when it’s happening to you.

Jeff Ritter: Far, far less funny in real life.


eD! Thomas: very upsetting.

Jeff Ritter: unnerving in real life. Yes, that sucks. I’m sorry that that happened. Hopefully you got it all fixed up 

eD! Thomas: I did. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Jeff Ritter: Yeah, that would suck. So what was it out of your, what, what, what you said was the sink?

eD! Thomas: No, it was the, uh, one that filters in [01:06:00] the water to the toilet tank.

Jeff Ritter: Oh, Jesus. Okay, that’s actually kind of better because if it happens in the sink and you have like a vanity, sometimes you don’t realize until the the water’s already like seeped through and ruined all the wood and stuff, so maybe that was a little bit better. Did it do a lot of damage?

eD! Thomas: No, it didn’t do any damage because it

Jeff Ritter: Oh, good. 

eD! Thomas: It shot at me, I found a bucket to kind of like shoot it like into there, sort of?

Jeff Ritter: Would love to see you catching toilet water with a bucket, like slipping and sliding. Like it was fucking Laurel and Hardy or the Three Stooges would have been absolutely hilarious to say, was it a metal bucket? Cause that would have been the best, like an old plastic.

eD! Thomas: Yeah, red plastic bucket. Sorry.

Jeff Ritter: Lie to me, lie to 

eD! Thomas: It was a metal bucket.

Jeff Ritter: It was, I knew it.

I knew it. Um, is [01:07:00] there any chance that you like stepped in the bucket and slid and fell into the shower? I don’t want you to get hurt. I’m talking about like, yeah, I knew it. I knew it. I knew that was what happened.

eD! Thomas: Yeah, everything you’ve said is exactly how it went down.

Jeff Ritter: I knew it would be. So I’m getting the Ultra. 

No need for me to get the, uh, AirPods, because the truth is I don’t even like the AirPods Pros. And I’m definitely getting the Pro. Obviously, I just, I just don’t know. I gotta, I gotta see about the Max. I gotta see about the

eD! Thomas: Telling you right now, telling you right now, you will spend a year regretting it, and telling me every time I talk to you that I’m right.

Jeff Ritter: All right.

eD! Thomas: I do not want that for you. I want you to be happy. This is impor It’s important to me. My happiness hinges on you being happy. With this one decision that I actually influenced.

Jeff Ritter: you know what I have 

eD! Thomas: one. What do [01:08:00] you gotta do?

Jeff Ritter: I need to, I need to hold them both side by side again and see if it’s worth it. I got to find a Max.

eD! Thomas: You got to find a Max? I can just drive to your house right now and hand you the phone, but you also have to remember it’s lighter because it’s titanium. That’s like 20 grams that you’re saving 20 

Jeff Ritter: That’s true. That’s a lot of grams. It’s twice as many as 10 grams.

eD! Thomas: Four times as many as five. Did 

Jeff Ritter: I think you’re only eight, I think you’re only eight grams short of an ounce at that point 

eD! Thomas: if you had two, if you had two grams. And you multiplied it by 10, that would be how many grams it would be. By the way, uh,

Jeff Ritter: Let’s address what the fuck just happened. So everybody we’re on, obviously we’re, you know, we have video going and, and, [01:09:00] uh, Ed just held up. I don’t know what he did. If he touched his screen or if he did some sort of weird gesture, 

eD! Thomas: Held up two fingers.

Jeff Ritter: but he held up two fingers and the fucking, like a birthday celebration filter went off and balloons started coming up.


eD! Thomas: it’s gonna go again.

Jeff Ritter: how did then,

eD! Thomas: So,

Jeff Ritter: is that only you?

eD! Thomas: yeah, because I’m running Mac OS Sonoma, um, on this computer. And you can, you are running Ventura. And like, oh, what I did, I 

Jeff Ritter: What’s, wait, what’s newer?

eD! Thomas: Sonoma is the newer one. It’s not out yet. This is the beta.

Jeff Ritter: Oh, I was gonna say,

eD! Thomas: This is, the beta, 

Jeff Ritter: I just 

eD! Thomas: it comes, it comes out on the 26th.

Um, iOS 17 comes out on the 18th.

Jeff Ritter: trying. I don’t know, didn’t know.

eD! Thomas: he’s, he’s sitting there, just so, just, just to give you all a, he’s like flashing hand signs at me. I’m just like, is he trying to tell me that I’m [01:10:00] wrong about the date things coming out? Uh, I’m not. Uh, he was just

Jeff Ritter: No, I’m like Yogi Berra, I’m just throwing out, I’m trying to get you to throw the inside fastball, you know, just throwing signs out there.

eD! Thomas: How did I do it? There it goes.

Jeff Ritter: You did it. There it is. Oh my God. There’s a thumbs up one. Is this because you’re using the iPhone camera or this is the 

eD! Thomas: This is, this is part of Sonoma. Yeah, it would work out. It’ll work on. Yeah, it’s, I, I gotta be honest with you. This is, this hasn’t happened in any of my other calls and I have calls.

Oh, I don’t, you know what? I was on sabbatical. I didn’t have calls. That’s 

Jeff Ritter: You didn’t have calls. I’m S I’m so excited. When does it come out? Like two weeks.

eD! Thomas: The 26th. Yeah. Look at that. That was

Jeff Ritter: That was confetti. That was confetti. Let me tell you something. Anybody that’s listening, this is not good podcasting for you guys, but this is great to see for us.

eD! Thomas: Yeah, yeah, this is pretty dope. I gotta be honest with you.

Jeff Ritter: [01:11:00] I will tell you, I’m very left out.

I don’t like this. I am very left out

eD! Thomas: So, what you didn’t hear in the episode that we recorded about Sonoma, I did mention this, uh, but we were both so utterly dismissive of it, we’re like, uh, who cares? And now, I am charmed! 

Jeff Ritter: I remember you saying that, we are officially eating our words. We really are eating our words. Cause I, now I do, I, I can’t even backtrack. I definitely was like, who gives a fuck about that? You know, you probably said it early in the episode, low on the list, you know, we just set the base camp and you’re like, Hey, I can throw up fingers and get balloons on my fuck.

Now I’m sitting here like how many days set an alarm, get an upgrade to Sonoma so I can 

eD! Thomas: gonna, gonna download the beta right now, it’s fine,

Jeff Ritter: I got to get in there. Got to get in Unbelievable. 

eD! Thomas: Wow. Let that be a lesson to us, that, whimsy, and you know what, I think it’s a lesson that I learned as my sabbatical [01:12:00] went on, cause this was announced in June, like, and I was, I was a pretty, uh, let’s call it a low point at the start of my sabbatical. Uh, whimsy is, is what I’m about now. And this is, this is, I should have been more excited.

I should have

Jeff Ritter: Uh, yeah, I think a tip, I think a tip for us is don’t, don’t dismiss. Don’t dismiss anything cause you don’t know what, well, that’s, that’s not

true. Don’t, don’t dismiss certain things. Cause like. I dismissed everyone that buys a regular iPhone, like completely dis I think I might have told them to go fuck off or whatever.

I stay that one I stand by, I say it every year and I stick with it

eD! Thomas: was going to say, if we’re, if we’re not going to be judging things, we literally have nothing to talk about. So that’s, that’s going to be a

Jeff Ritter: By the way, both of my, my two older kids, the little one doesn’t have a phone because that would be suicide mission for me, but the two older kids because they have after school stuff, you know, I wait, you know they got to a certain age and I got them the phones. They both get regular. Those two are not walking around with [01:13:00] Pros

eD! Thomas: not.

Jeff Ritter: You know, But fuck them too.

eD! Thomas: you can’t honestly, they’re not allowed to listen to this. So 

Jeff Ritter: You’re getting out. You’re getting the iPhone for free free loader. Take a regular one. Shut up Get 

eD! Thomas: yeah. 

Jeff Ritter: You want a Pro? Get a job. Give me, you give me the 63 a month or whatever the fuck it is. You can have whatever you want until then shut up. Do you use your two lenses and be happy? The rest of the meth heads. So

eD! Thomas: yeah, no, all right, so, so, but, but hey, at least we’ve learned a lesson because I’m going to say it one more time because I love the word, we can’t dismiss whimsy. We’ve got it. We got to lean into it. We have got to lean into whimsy. We can dismiss whatever we want for being stupid, but if it’s just going to bring just a little spark of joy, we should be chasing that

Jeff Ritter: Yeah, I’m with you. We both need more whimsy in our life. I, I give you my word to do my best not to dismiss [01:14:00] whimsy. I may dismiss it by accident. I’m looking toward to you to, you know, bring me back from the ledge. 

Whimsy and I haven’t always gotten along.

eD! Thomas: But we’re gonna make it. We’re gonna become the Whimsy Twins. This is gonna be an Whimsy podcast.

Jeff Ritter: I am, I am in, I am in. Is there a podcast category for Whimsy? Put us in there in that description. I don’t know how you do that.

eD! Thomas: We’re gonna be the number one Whimsy podcast in multiple countries. But Malta, most importantly.

Jeff Ritter: I feel like we’ve been very anti whimsical. We’re not whimsical folk.

eD! Thomas: What? I feel like I’ve spent a lot of time and I know this is about to get real serious But like, you know, when you’ve got that whole ADHD brain, you try to act like a normal, and I’ve gotten away from being the weird, whimsical kid that I used to be. I’m bringing it back. I, I got, I got my, I got my flowery shirts.

I got, I got weird ass glasses. I don’t care. What are you people gonna do to me? What are you gonna

Jeff Ritter: [01:15:00] You look fucking fantastic.

eD! Thomas: Who’s gonna make fun of me that I haven’t already made fun of myself worse?

Jeff Ritter: I don’t think anybody, I don’t think anybody’s going to make fun of

eD! Thomas: No, and if they do, they can, they can kick rocks. I look like a million bucks.

Jeff Ritter: I should probably not, not talk about being whimsical as I sit here in my eighth black shirt of the week with the lights almost completely off and having just told probably the majority of our listeners to fuck themselves.

eD! Thomas: first of all, don’t worry about the majority of our listeners.

Jeff Ritter: Yeah, yeah, no, no. They’ll, yeah, they’ll be okay.

They’ll both be fine. 

eD! Thomas: And you know what? You’re just, you’re using mood lighting. We’re both in darker rooms. I mean, sure, my lights are purple, but you know, it’s fine.

Jeff Ritter: Yeah. I just try to get, I don’t know how you, your lighting is so well done. I don’t know how you do it. It’s, 


eD! Thomas: It’s whimsy, it’s just straight, straight from the heart is what it

Jeff Ritter: I don’t have that.

eD! Thomas: We’re going to get you there.

Jeff Ritter: I [01:16:00] like that. I

eD! Thomas: We’re going to be fun, silly little gooses.

Jeff Ritter: Fun time. Folks, by the way, this is very easy to say knowing that there this there wouldn’t may not be another podcast for six months You just never know. I got a bunch of stuff to talk to Ed about though! Like I like a really like a written down list, so, uh, Hey, there’s a slight chance that there’s another podcast

eD! Thomas: You know what? The problem has been first of all, we had problems with software. Those seem to be resolved because we got through this entire episode without any, uh, so what we usually happen is that either Jeff or I would be talking, and then the other person would text the person, Hey, I can no longer hear and or see you. And then we’d spend 25 minutes trying to figure it out. And then I’d end up downloading 14 different audio files that didn’t mesh together correctly.

And and it was too much to edit. It was too much to edit. I’m I can’t do that. I what kind of who do you think I am a guy who had three months off from [01:17:00] work who could just sit there and edit things all day?

No, I had beaches to go to. I had pools to swim in. I had Barbie movies to see. Get your 

Jeff Ritter: Yeah. Get off his back.

eD! Thomas: Jeez, folks. Come on, 

Jeff Ritter: Let the man live 

eD! Thomas: bunch of dickheads. What’s going on

Jeff Ritter: he’s fucking come on trying to drain the whimsy out of this guy already I mean five minutes into this journey.

eD! Thomas: But now, now this entire, we’ve been recording. I don’t know how long this episode is going to actually be, but we’ve been recording for about an hour and a half. No hiccups. No problem. Everything’s been great. This is going to be two files to download. One for each of us. I can blow through that editing in 

Jeff Ritter: That’s not bad. So, um, all right. Did we miss anything?

eD! Thomas: No, just me missing you until this moment. I’m so glad you’re here.

Jeff Ritter: This has been real nice. I needed this.

eD! Thomas: I knew this too.

Jeff Ritter: I miss, I miss you. Like the, [01:18:00] like as Everything But The Girl would say, like the desert miss the rain.

eD! Thomas: I can’t even top that.

Jeff Ritter: No, you can’t. I’m sorry.

You can’t. If there was someone that could top it, it would be you. But that one is this. 


eD! Thomas: That’s it. Talk to you later. I love you.

Jeff Ritter: I love you. I gotta go pre order my phone.

eD! Thomas: Do it.